Computer Security Haiku

In a column I did for USENIX' ;Login: journal, I invited readers to submit computer security-related haiku. I got some really top-notch submissions! Not only are USENIX readers poetic and creative, they are clearly in tune with the subtleties of Internet security.

(All are Copyright(c) 2000, by their respective authors. The authors reserve all rights.)


My PC's been hacked.
I know who the culprit is.
He's got it coming.
  The guy was boasting...
I shared my network drive with
No password protect.
  Management report...
Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt
....He will be dismissed.
- Jay Busari    


The extra bits fall
out onto the command line...
buffer overflow!
  Life is too fleeting.
Don't forget to stop each day
and sniff the packets.
-Mark Maris    

Other Entries:

Watch the packets flow like water
In and out they go
One must learn to guide their way
-Joseph Iacovelli

  Gates open and close,
deciding the fate of the
bits on either side.
Twisted and mangled
bits of rubbish hiding their
true identity.
  A night owl peering
into darkness waiting for
an intruding rat.
- Douglas Lee Schales    

  It only takes a
user with a modem to
compromise your LAN
-Mark Grennan    

Dreamcast with browser
managing complexity.
Need security!
  Read bugtraq each day.
New vulnerability.
Rush to plug it up.
  Buffer overflow
Poor bounds checking in software
lets the hackers in.
-Fuat   Hackers in the news:
Distributed D-O-S
Yahoo, eBay hit.

  Packets walk the net
poking holes we cannot find
what stops the kaboom?
-Mary Seabrook    

Whereis the wizard?
Client hack superuser!
...Guru vacation...
-Ed Malinowski (note: This Haiku was written completely with USENIX refrigerator magnets.)  

  root password mumbled
aloud in a crowded lab.
how fast can i type?
-Hugh Kennedy    

Security matters now
Theo, please be nice
  Security hole
Open, you are insecure
Closed, you are no threat
-Shidoshi   Audit your code friend
Buffers overflow plenty
On the stack or heap

  ids online
security guards at door
"janitors" work late
-Evan Cordes    

  A bus passing by
houses of digital cards
set on shifting sand.
Vultures flock above
confident victims hiding
behind nylon walls.
  On to the bay sails
a foundered ship on top of
a melting iceberg.
-Douglas Lee Schales    

corporate firewall
desktop machine with modem
mis loses
  all front doors are locked
unmonitored side entrance
security breach
  packets on a wire
consuming all my bandwidth
d-o-s victim
buffer overflow
vacationing sysadmin
computer is mine
    marshalling data
buffer overflows the stack
insert program here
-Michael Shiplett e-mail attachment
installs computer virus
scripting can be fun